Tuesday, August 26, 2008

Mom's Music

Growing up, mom played records every Saturday and Sunday. I knew the words but never the artist or record. She loved music. She was one of those people who made odd but masterful compilation cds - helping you appreciate each song more because of the contrast and progression. I have been listening to her eclectic collection, soon to be divided among me and my siblings.

Just a few of my favorites:
· As Time Goes By – Jimmy Durante
· Cry to Me – Solomon Burke
· Smoke Gets in Your Eyes – The Platters
· Sailing – Christopher Cross
· Blue Skies – Ella Fitzgerald
· Always on My Mind – Willie Nelson

It’s been a lesson in art as well as a walk back in time.

Listening to Louis Armstrong sing it’s a wonderful world, one of my mom’s favorites, is a bittersweet moment for me - harder than I thought it would be. But then so has this year. Sometimes I wish time would just stop for moments of great joy as well as great pain. But it doesn’t. You have to grieve in the midst of life – or maybe I should say, live in the midst of grieving.
I find it wierd that life just keeps going as if nothing has changed. This music plays in my head and it seems strange because I associate much of it with her. You hear people say, "its as if the music died with them", and I understand what they mean, only it didn't. It plays on - and it hurts, but I love it.


Emily Bertholic said...

Hey John, several of those songs on your list are songs I associate with my mom and my childhood, particularly "What A Wonderful World." We played that song at my mom's funeral 5 years ago. And I still hurt when I listen to it. Music is such a bittersweet thing. I regularly marvel at how certain pieces can take me back to a specific time, place, or person, and how music speaks to my heart in a way nothing else does. This blog struck a chord with me. Today I am right there with you.

Sidra Metzger said...

This is your cousin, we have never met. It is sad to me that I have first cousins who I have not yet had the privilege of knowing. While I also never got to be close to your Mom because of the distance, I did have the honor of calling her my Aunt. The memories that I do have are all very fond and it doesn't seem real that I won't have the opportunity to create more memories with her. I want to thank you for allowing me to know her better through your blog. Even more importantly, it has given me a chance to learn more about a cousin I have never met. I am amazed by what a wonderful person you are and how lovely your family is. My hope is that I will get to know you better.
Much love,